The Bachelorette Post-Show Hangover:
Episode 7 – More GushNuts, Please!
This week, scandals are exposed! Hunter tries his hardest to scare off the newest member of the gang’s Bachelorette viewing parties by insisting that organic matter was brought to earth by comets made of cocktail liqueur. (Really.) We shine some light on one of Kerry’s questionable office habits. (Hint: she has more in common with Sylvester the Drunk Squirrel than we realized.)
Cush is acquitted of a long-standing accusation concerning his eating habits. Hunter learns that the top-shelf wine selection he proudly presented to this week’s watch party is the girl’s least favorite varietal. And, speaking of fancy words like “varietal,” the gang discovers that Hunter’s only conversational survival skill has been to just repeat things smart people say.
And then there’s this week’s Bachelorette episode, which had no lack of scandal itself. We mean, really. Have you ever seen so much nudity in one season, let alone one episode? What is up with this year’s birthday suit obsession?
When our bachelorette isn’t forcing the men to undress for various “group date activities,” the men are either voluntarily stripping on their own or rendering likenesses of their members in art class. (Oh, and apparently everyone’s favorite crazy eyes forest ranger, Blake, has been rolling around the resort, talking about his Canadian bacon every time the cameras are off!) Has quarantine really bored us this much??
Well, it’s hasn’t left Hunter, Cush and Kerry with any less to talk about. This week’s episode is jam-packed with episode reviews, big reveals, controversial opinions and – wait for it – the release of a brand new product your kids will be begging for. That’s right, check your local grocer’s freezer for “GushNuts!” Not privvy to the GushNuts fever now sweeping the Lowcountry? You will be soon.
Ladies and gentleman, pour yourself a glass of that leftover Merlot Kerry and Kelsi refused to touch, find a comfy seat on the couch (if you can, between all Hunter’s cookie crumbs) and settle in for a doozie of an episode.
